Friday, January 25, 2013

Dating with kids

This was the year that I finally felt like a grown up.
It wasn't the wrinkles that did it...
It wasn't the 7 kids running around...
It was something much less fun.

This was the year for divorce in our circle of friends.
And as I picked my head up out of the craziness of my own life,
I realized that there are many more of my friends who would never divorce on paper but have long divorced their spouse in their heart.

It was as if God took me by the shoulders and shook me:
 "Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall."
1 Corinthians 10:12
 
I took a good long look at our marriage.
Jim and I don't fight often (we reserved that for our first 2 years of marriage)
instead we become coworkers; living together, running a family.
We get so busy managing the kids, the house, the schedules;
by the time I can finally turn my attention on him, I have forgotten who he is.
Or the fact that I adore him above everyone else on this earth!

Our numerous friends terrible situation was like a gigantic red flag waving in the breeze.
Warning me to get my head up out of the smoke and look at where I was headed.

So I quit making excused and started making plans.
No more; 
"This is just a season.  We will date when the kids are older and easier to manage."
or
"Who has the time or can afford to go out once a week?!"
or
"He used to plan dates; he should plan them now!"

Now I pick a day of the week, put it on the calendar and protect it with my life.
Every now and then we go out but most of the time we put the kids to bed early and eat a meal together (one that does not consist of fried chicken or hot dogs).  Sometimes we watch a movie, play a board game or just sit by the fire pit.
 
It has breathed new life into our marriage.
I look forward to those nights all week long.
 
Are you protecting your marriage?
Are you being purposeful with your time with your spouse?
Are you modeling the marriage you hope your children will one day have?
 
Over the last few months since we started this, this verse has been in my head:
 
"sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.”
Genesis 4:7
 
Don't busy yourself so much with the day to day, that you take your eyes off of what is eternal. 
 

 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Beth You amaze me. So proud of you and what you stand for. Glad that I remember all your years since birth. You have come so far. Brings tears to my eyes. Just amazing.