Friday, September 7, 2012

Calling the shots...(a Momma Lucy post)



CALLING THE SHOTS FROM THE CORNER OF THE WOMB!!!

OK, before we go much further, you have to turn back the hands of time or set the sun-dial back to the late 1970’s.  Maternity fashion WAS NOT like the cute outfits you see today.  Nope….not at all.  Basically I could have driven to the hardware store, bought a canvas tent, added a few darts and strings to tie in the back and I had my maternity outfit!  And I will only talk about this once….the maternity underwear!!  The Army could add a few straps to it and then use it for parachuting into enemy territory.

So here I was going into my last trimester and getting rather large.  I had chosen to stay with our family doctors for my OB care.  During those years our family docs, who were General Practitioners, still delivered babies.  I felt comfortable with this, safe and secure.   This ripening gift I was carrying decided to do some kind of somersault and get into a position that made it difficult to tell “what was going on in there”.  The doctor thought “It” may be breech.  So a “Procedure” was scheduled at the hospital…an ultrasound.

Remember, this is when you had to go to the hospital for an ultrasound; there was no such thing as doing it in the office.  The instructions for me….drink about a quart and a half of water one hour before the “procedure”.  The nurse said, “We need you to have a full bladder.”  Hey, no problem with that.  I did as I was told.

When I arrived at the hospital for this “procedure”, I was ready!  Tent dress on, baby “It” nestled front & center and a very full bladder, only to be told that they had to work-in an elderly gentleman before me and they were running 30 minutes behind schedule.  About this time my precious “gift” decided to practice what seemed like boxing and jabbing moves.  I can only assume that “Baby It” did not like anything, including a very full bladder, invading its space.  Already calling the shots, “Baby It” had demanded its own space, proclaiming this was its room for nine months!

As I stood in the waiting area for my ultrasound with my eyeballs floating in my head; I almost considered rescheduling.  I thought I was going to POP.  About that time the technician came up to me and said, “I’m ready for you as soon as I can get an attendant to come and move the elderly ‘Mr. B’ off the exam table.”  WHAT????  I thought, step aside lady, I can get ‘Mr. B.” off that table!  I’ll do the fireman’s carry if I have to.  I Need that Table….My Baby needs that Table…and If NOT….There’s gonna’ be a Flood!

I finally had the ultrasound.  It was a small screen positioned behind my head.   All I could see was what looked liked the face of “Mr. Clean” in a snowstorm.  Is that my little bundle of joy?   The technician said it was somewhat difficult to get a good reading since the baby was constantly in motion (hint for the future) and my bladder was almost too full…go figure.  She was not allowed to tell me much of anything….not the sex of the baby (we didn’t want to know), not the approximate weight; only that it appeared the due date was Nov.12th.    The only problem…no one ran this date by the “current resident” and that baby wasn’t budging!  But look what’s coming….



*** Stay Tuned - Up Next….The Delivery and God’s two words.

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