Tuesday, November 8, 2011

CRAZY parenting: tips from my toolbox

I know you want an apple butter post...it's coming I promise!
Today I wanted to share with you tips from the trenches.
Things I have learned while parenting my hurt kids that have helped me also parent my healthy kids better.

Take them, stick em in your back pocket, pull em out on a rainy day.

On days when you wake up and your screaming at the kids to stop screaming...you know what I'm talking about! It's breakfast and you can already tell this is going to be one of those days.
This is the perfect time to grab a whisk, jump up on top of a chair and belt out their favorite Disney princess song, or a corny 80's tune.
The kids will think you have lost it!
But it always turns the day around.

When you have 2 in the car that are fighting with each other, calmly pull the car over somewhere safe, ask the 2 offenders to get out and finish their fight outside.
When they are done they can join you again.
If this seems to be a reoccurring theme have them get out and do some jumping jacks then hug and profess their undying love to each other while embracing before getting back into the car.
(this may or may not have happened today)

When you have a major fit thrower,
take the actress or actor to a room (away from siblings)
and tell them to throw the biggest fit they got!
This is called prescribing the problem and it takes the fun right out of it!

If you have a door slammer or a foot stomper,
tell them you realize they are angry and since they are so angry you are going to let them slam the door 15 more times.
Or stomp their feet back and forth to their room 5 more times.
You can even join them if you'd like.

So here is the warning: it is so easy to cross the line from silly and fun, to patronizing and sarcastic. That is not OK. When you find yourself there you are no longer helping them you are hurting them. Stop immediately and get some space. Been there done that.

Love ya'll.
Hope this helps you on all those CrAzY days!

Here is THE BEST resource for learning more therapeutic parenting techniques. Christine Moers youtube videos

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