"A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control."
I've heard it said when a pastor preaches on something he is sure to face trial on it. I wonder if that is true when you blog about something? I wrote about punishment the other day and man I wanted to dish some out today! I think somehow I am a red headed at heart. I have one hot button and someone not only pushed it they sat on it today! It's injustice...especially in children! How funny that we ended up circling the juvenile court system for 2 years. My button was stuck in the on position. I thought I had mastered my raging emotions. Let's just say I have not.
Can I tell you the MOST frustrating thing I have found since becoming a Christian?! I can't seem to get angry, frustrated or feel wronged without God bringing to mind a time I was just the same. So then I get angry at God. "Why do you have to bring that up now?" "Don't I have the right to be angry for just a little while?" Apparently not.
Today I wanted to punish someone. "You did this to me and to the ones I love, well I have more power than you. Watch what I can do!" I can't help but be thankful that God doesn't work like that. How often have I hurt Him or someone else and been offered undeserved grace and mercy? Probably everyday. Now, I do think I can make wise decisions in the future based on what I know. But those decisions will be based on love and safety, not on my need for revenge.
Oh but it would have felt good to tell them just what I thought of them!!!!!! At least at first. By now I would be sitting here with a lump in my throat and asking forgiveness for taking things in my own hands. What I did, walking away, felt awful! I got NO satisfaction from it! But I have found doing the right thing doesn't satisfy right away. And you know, now it doesn't seem quite so bad.
I try to teach my kids to walk away and let Mommy or Daddy deal with the offender, not to take it in their own angry hands. If they step in they both end up in trouble. How many times do I find myself the child needing to learn my own lesson?
Here's to all the Mama's that still have some fight in them. And to the good Daddy that fights so we don't have to!